SA and generational trauma

In this family, we were taught that home was not a safe place

Taught our girls to lock their doors

Trust their gut

Stay in a group


We did all this to protect our girls,

But we didn't leave our men.


We didn't openly speak on what they did

We said we protected our girls


But what we really did was taught them they would need to fight to protect themselves


If we were really trying to protect them

Their abusers wouldn't still be family


And how do we balance the needs of each human involved in this circle of fire


This hellish reality of mistrust, 

vibe checks, 

shock, horror, 

rape and abuse


Loss of innocence

Fear of loss


Where does the balance lie

On the knife edge of loving both sides

Because so long as we walk the edge

We are cutting our own feet to ribbons


It seems that in this

prisoners get it right

Isolate or pay with your body for what you've done to anothers

At least there, the lines are clear. 

Out here, it gets blurry. 

Family ties creating a web 

obligation and guilt

Sadness and betrayal


I am ready for the shushing to stop

For the hushed conversations and compromises to die

I can't walk the blade any more



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